Thursday, March 18, 2010

I need family members.

I'd like to invite any & everyone to create a family with me. You can pick your own made up relation to me. The real list of family just keeps getting smaller & smaller.

Today, for he first time in several days, I spoke to my mother. I decided to be annoying since I'd not called in a week, so I called every hour or so. Just because. I was in a mood.

Finally answered after several calls. It was an exciting 4 minutes of being responded to, let me tell you.

About 1 minute of telling me why they didn't answer my calls all day until now.

About 20 seconds of discussion about how I'd been sick, after I brought it up.

About 1 minute discussion of my cousin having a baby. They already knew, more than I knew in fact. She had a c-section after around 17 hours of labor & the comment that went something like, "they know what they are doing down there, they did it right." I guess that is a shot at me & my 24 plus hour long labors. Maybe even a shot at the whole dead baby thing, but maybe I'm sensitive.

About 1 minute of discussion of lumber.

The end.

Ugh. Why do I even bother?

Oh yeah, I remember. They have pets. I'd hate to find out they died a week ago & the pets went hungry all that time.

No asking about Jules. No asking about the other baby or his important ultrasound. Of course everyone else in the family knows it was fine (because they asked) so I suppose they've heard it is. Of course, I find it funny that my close family has to hear from distant family, when even people who live across the country check in with me personally to make sure things are going well. I live 10 minutes from people, but that doesn't make it easier.

Moving is totally on the to do list now in the next couple years.

My cousins wifes mother (confused?) seemed more concerned about my ultrasound & talked to me about my medical problems last week before she made her way home. She had been told by the cousins wife, so she just wanted to know how things were. On her own. Without anyone making her ask or me telling her. After making us & our kids a snack. She's not even related to me minus a distant legal connection & I've only been around her maybe 5 times in my life. And even though she was in the hurry the other day, I think that discussion was longer than 4 minutes.


OK. Whatever.

I'm not taking applications or anything, I'm not picky. But if you'd like to adopt me as a cousin, sister, or even daughter I am very available. I figure beggers can't be choosers. Plus, really, can I get any worse than what I've got? I doubt it. Remember, you can also adopt the husband if you rather. We are both free & clear for the most part. Take us, we're yours.

Anyone want to come visit & either watch my toddler or hold my hand as I give birth? At this rate, we don't have anyone to stay with Jules while I'm in the hospital being induced, so you can either opt to babysit him while Adam is with me or watch he miracle of life live & in person as Adam watches various Buzz Lightyear shows with the toddler.

I'm really unsure which would be worse. Flip a coin.

I'm not sad, just annoyed.

I'm off to order my son a kick ass swing set. Slides are cooler than grandparents I bet.


  1. I'll sign up if you do the same. Since I have no parents and fund the ILs annoying, I worry about being all alone with baby.

  2. We're cousins now. I adopted you. Sorry they aren't being good parents. That blows. I know you 2 are good parents and that's pretty awesome.

  3. Jess, I'll adopt you as a sister. I get you, I really do and not having a kickass family myself, I know how you feel. If you were closer I'd be delighted to come hold your hand during your delivery. Sending you hugs

  4. I will be related to you... I will even let you pick the relation.

  5. Third cousin twice removed? I don't even know you, but you feel like family with as often as I read your blog. I <3 your blog by the way. You give me hope.

  6. We've been married for forever already.

  7. Can I be your grandmothers aunts sisters cousin?? Cause that would rock!

  8. I'll adopt you as a sister! I've always wanted one; grew up with three brothers and now I have three sons. : ) I only wish we lived closer, although, I do live on an island in the Gulf of Mexico off the coast of Florida..a very nice place to visit...

  9. You are officially my 2nd cousin.... we don't have the competition or the angst of sharing grandparents.... and we get to see each other at weddings, family reunions, and the occasional summer bonfire... and when we do (and we're not pregnant) - we enjoy getting tipsy together and singing 80's songs at the top of our lungs while our husbands hide their faces in embarrassment. Everyone questions if we are actually long lost sisters - mysteriously separated at birth. :o) Much love to you cousin!!!!

  10. Well, I've already offered to watch the kid. You know what could potentially happen with that and you trust me. Feels like family to me. Plus, you attended my wedding and I think had more fun than some of my actual family. My mom has been wanting us to have children forever so she could treat Jules and Blair like her own grandchildren. Hell, she'd spoil the hell out of them AND be someone you could talk to. I think it's settled, you are now my sister. Not to mention that you could live up here and Adam could teach for Washington County Schools, I hear teachers there make bank. And to top it off, the house next to us is for sale! LOL

  11. Jess, I'll adopt you. :) I feel like I know you better then some of my cousins LOL

  12. Eh Neil and I will be your crazy Canadian relatives.



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